You Always, Never Change

The alarm went off at 4 am.  Because some things never change.

The smoothie filled with spinach and berries and coconut milk.  The coffee smell filling the air.  The brown dog wiggling in excitement at another day, watching me intently.  Because some things never change.

Surveying.  Chemistry.  That HP calculator I don’t know how to use and it’s sticky number 3.  The field book and my painstaking notes that I hope are good enough.  Did I remember to do everything?  Don’t forget –

The book of coaching materials – workouts and drills.  A stack of notes on other people’s stroke work.  I love the bird’s eye view from the pool deck and the chlorine smell. It satisfies me in a way that my own achievements haven’t.

Running from the pool to class. The calculations trickling from the faucet in my brain down my arm and out the end of my pencil.  I’m not sure.  Is it?  

… I can do this.  Because some things never change.

Work calls.  Some kind of drama with something.  And a report due.  Can you do it?  Of course I can.  Because some things never change.  The hours disappear.  I’m not sure where they went.

I sit at a table by myself for lunch.  I look around for a familiar face but there are none.  Just me, today.  I am content.  Because some things never change.

And my brain switches from one flow to another.  The notes are frantic and disjointed – I am tired. 12 hours?  Already?  Just make it through this class…

Down to the water.  Slipping into the secret abandon and whispering under the calm stillness.  I believe in me. I believe in me.  Because some things never change.

Drive an hour and a half to get back home.  Back to the brown dog.  Back to more work and homework.

I want to watch TV.  Maybe this weekend I can schedule it in…

Because some things never change.

I kinda like you, Bethany Bosch.  If anybody is going to get something done, it’s you.  Because you always, never change.

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